It’s the end of the school year so let the good times begin. I attended my son’s final play and let me tell you it was more adorable than you could imagine. He was the lead and thee best lion there is – his roar was ferocious. “Go Munch”
Upon exiting I bumped into a Mom, who I met the previous year. She states, “oh it’s been a minute since I’ve seen you – oh yeah, you’re one of those moms who work a lot.” She said it with a smile, but my face was all —– what?! I can only assume what my facial expression looked like because she responds, “but you look pretty tho.” The shade!
Now in my mind I’ve killed her about 1000 times, she’s been body slammed, drop-kicked again and again. In reality I chose to be proactive instead of reactive. After I fixed my face, I said “thank you” and walked away holding my baby boy’s hand.
I was mad, hotter than fish grease, moreso about her judgment of my parenting skills. It’s funny because often times people tend to judge themselves off of the their intentions and others by their actions. She’s lucky I know who I am, but it got me to thinking – what it is to be a working mom. I may not be the Mom who shows up for every single field trip, but I show up for ALL of the important events.
The life of a working mom consists of many things, and being at every single field trip is NOT one of them:
After working a long day, I still make dental/ doctor appointments, for routine visits or because my kid came home with ringworm, flu, strep throat or pink eye – which they’ve clearly gotten from school – it’s clear you didn’t make sure their hands were washed during those field trips;
I’m in the E.R. at 1:30 a.m. after I’ve worked a long day because my oldest sons asthma doesn’t like normal business hours;
After I’ve worked my 9-5 I come home to cook dinner while helping each of my son’s with their homework; my 1st grader reads at a 4th grade level; 7th grader can teach you anything you need to know about Science;
Our morning car rides consist of affirmations and evening car rides are filled with the joys and pains of their day; (awards received: principled, integrity, honor roll and exudes confidence)
My eyes have fought back tears to comfort theirs; my winks have boosted their confidence;
My lips have kissed many scrapes/ bruises, bee-stings and can heal a scratch;
My hugs have comforted their toughest days;
My ears have heard and listened to many spoken and unspoken words;
My cheers have helped win many races; my wisdom has comforted many losses;
My handholds have been the best protection and security;
I’ve slayed monsters, beaten up shadows and killed many spiders, flies and ants while being afraid myself;
My stares (the evil Mommy stare as they call it) can/has stopped them in their tracks; like the one I gave you (insert smile);
My intuition has redirected their paths often;
I’ve worn the Where’s Waldo hat many times to find lost toys, shoes, video games, glasses, etc;
I said all of that to say that there is NO perfect parent and I don’t need your judgment or validation. Parenting does not come with a rulebook and each situation requires a different version of me. Each of us do the best we can and hope that we instill the important things like love, hope, joy, respect and faith. Parenting is hard work! If you are blessed to raise happy, healthy decent human beings who are productive, especially in this society, you’ve done well.
Ma’am, be thankful you caught me on a good day because the next time Jesus may be busy. I’m a work in progress – so work with the kid. Tho you may not always see me physically, just know that I am ALWAYS present! Those two (2) handsome, polite, confident, smart kids come from a Mom, whose only goal is for them to be their best selves. This isn’t to bash Moms who stay at home, I take my hat off to you and all you do. This article is to let that Mother know that I’m not just one of those working Mom’s – I’m actually a Super (S)hero disguised as one!